Tapi

Hanya engkau yang faham aku.
Lebih dari aku faham aku.
Hanya engkau reti aku.
Lebih dari yang lain reti aku.
Hanya engkau tahan aku.
Labih dari yang lain tahan aku.
Hanya engkau bahu aku.
Bahu lain tak sama.
Hanya engkau tisu aku.
Tisu lain tak sama.
Hanya engkau painkiller aku.
Painkiller lain tak setanding.
Hanya engkau laughing gas aku.
Gas lain tak setanding.
Hanya engkau bantal busuk aku.
Bantal lain tak sebusuk engkau.

Hanya engkau faham aku.
Hanya engkau faham aku.
Hanya engkau faham aku.

Tapi

KENAPA HANYA ENGKAU YANG TAK BOLEH UNTUK AKU?!

~najwa

p/s: Catatan zaman rebellious dan zaman kecelaruan.

Jika ada

Yang sompek itu aku
Yang buruk itu aku
Yang pecah itu aku
Yang cacat itu aku
Yang busuk itu aku
Yang cela itu aku
Yang kosong itu aku
Yang kurang itu aku.

Jadi jika ada mana-mana yang masih sanggup menerima aku, memenuhkan aku, mencantum pecah aku, aku terima. Nuff said.


~najwa

p/s: Because I am one messed up kid.

Faham. Sakit rasanya.

Skarang aku faham.
Bila dia cakap dia dah tak boleh bergurau tu macam mana rasanya.
Rasa pedih.
Not being able to joke around and hang around with someone you like without ever feeling guilty.
Sorry Atiqah. Sorry..!
:'(

~najwa

p/s: Ya Allah, dah lama tak rasa macam ni. Dugaan apa yang kau turunkan ni? Rasa sedih dan pedih hati sebijik macam masa aku break up dengan Man dulu. Ya Allah, tabahkanlah hati hambaMu yang lemah ini Ya Allah. Aku mohon daripada mu Ya Allah!

p/p/s: Banyak post luahan hati kat cni sebab dah tak boleh nak Tweet dengan bebas. Sebab memasing dah ada TweetDeck. Memasing stalk memasing. Memasing tau cerita memasing. Thank you and fuck you TweetDeck. Dan sebab aku dan Atiqah terlampau rapat sampai kami tau apa maksud Tweets kami. Kannnn? Shit bila dah terlalu rapat dan terlalu memahami. SHIT.

Saya hipokrit.

Aku berkonfrontasi dengan dia si kawan baik tadi.
Kami go all out. Heart to heart.
Dia nangis. First time dia nangis. Depan aku.
Nope, scratch that. Second time.
Dia luah semua.
Then dia cakap, 'Mesti sebab kita dah terlalu rapat.'
Aku sedih. Bila ayat tu keluar dari mulut dia, aku sentap.
Sedih. Sebak. Sunyi.
Macam masa Man mula-mula nak break up dengan aku dulu.
Macam tu la aku rasa.
Kesian jugak dia. Sebab dia jenis kawan dengan semua.
Tapi sebab aku, semua orang terasa dengan dia.
Terasa macam dia lupakan dorang.
Dan baru tadi dia mengaku yang sebenarnya dia rasa awkward.
Hari tu dia tak nak mengaku.
Bersungguh-sungguh dia menipu.
Sampai mati-mati aku percaya.
Tadi sampai menangis dia nak mengaku ke-awkward-an dia tu.
Pastu dia nangis lagi.
Dia cakap dia nak gurau dengan aku.
Nak touch-touch aku.
Nak tumbuk-tumbuk aku.
Tapi sebab dia awkward, dia tak nak buat.
Then terus kitorang jadi renggang sebab da kurang bergurau senda.
Macam apa je.
Dia jarang nak mencarut.
Tapi bila dia luah tadi, bila dia nangis, dia keluar SHIT sebijik.
Aku terkejut.
Aku tak tahan da.
Tak boleh layan lagi dah perasaan ni.
Makin di layan, makin menjadi-jadi nanti.
Dah la esok nak exam Genetik.
Tapi sebelum keluar aku cakap, 'Atiqah, sorry.'
Dia tanya kenapa?
'Sebab saya lagi tua daripada awak. Saya tak sepatutnya biar semua ni terjadi.'
Then aku terus blah.
Macam tu je.

Pastu dia text, saying everything is going to be alright.
Mulanya aku tak nak reply. Aku speechless.
Tapi aku takut dia rasa serba salah and tak boleh study, so aku reply jugak.

Shit la bila terlalu rapat. Shit la bila terlalu selesa. Shit la bila nak alone pun tak boleh.
Shit la bila terlalu bergantung kat orang.
Shit la bila orang dah tak respect kita. Shit la 2nd semester ni.
Shit.
Shit.
SHIT!

Aku balik, nak study. Tapi hati tak tenteram.
Baru hati tergerak nak bukak ayat-ayat Quran, zikir-zikir.
Aku rasa hina betul. Jijik dengan diri sendiri.
Sebab bila dah jadi macam-macam SHIT macam ni, baru aku nak dengar segala bapak zikir.
HIPOKRIT.

~najwa
p/s: Nampak tak how the word awkward boleh menjahanam kan sebuah persahabatan?!

p/p/s: Saya sayang awak Atiqah. Saya suka berkawan dengan awak. Tapi kalau dah jadi macam ni, saya pun dah tak tau nak buat macam mana dah. Sorry kerana dah mencalarkan sebuah persahabatan yang suci. Sorry. :((((

Shitty but Happy

How can you possibly be happy and shitty at the same time?

I was extremely happy today and had so much fun but then came this little girl and she ruined my day and made me feel shitty all over again.

But you know what bebe, I just need to be around the people I like just to feel happy. I don't need to be around her to make me feel bad about me self.

~najwa

p/s: I joined a futsal match today. It was my first time and we won GOLD..! Yeayy me..!

p/p/s: Happy 21st birthday Najwa. I love you :D

Rules in Friendship

Since I was feeling so bad about myself and about me being a very bad friend, I decided to Google the rules in friendship. And the results were:


1-Honesty
2-Reliability
3-Respect
4- Bros Before Hoes
5-Selfless
6-Loyalty in both good times and bad
7-Patience
8- Laugh Together Cry Together
9-Constructive Criticism
10- Forgiveness
11- Don't Date a Friend's Ex
12- Don't Steal Friends
13- Take Turns
14- Stand By Your Friends
15- Don't Blow Them Off
16- Keep your words and do what you say you'll do.
17- Do not talk bad about your friends.
18- Consider their point of views
19- Offer help without expecting anything in return.
20- Do not encourage them to violate their morals and principles.


Read more here, here and here.

So that's about it. A lesson to learn.

~najwa

p/s: Hope you guys find this post beneficial for you who are lost just like me.

This is a story of why I hate goodbyes.

I know there's 'good' in goodbye but I think that only applies to goodbyes in failed relationships.

I've said enough goodbyes for now and most of them weren't really something I would like to repeat.

Conclusionally (is that even a word?), there are three main reasons why I really hated goodbyes.

First of all, there's my mom who'd always go overboard with her emotions every time me or my sister are going back to Malaysia after our holidays. But that's just mom. She have a very soft heart and I know all mothers would feel the same way when it's about saying goodbye to their children.

Goodbye = Letting go

Then there's fights before goodbyes. This, I experienced thrice. First there was this very devastating fight that leads to a break up goodbye. Yeah, that was the hardest goodbye so far. Then there's my mom & dad fighting just about half an hour before my flight. They were fighting about money; like they always do. At that time I was trying so hard to held back the tears in my eyes. I never felt like running away from home as much as I did at that time. It was really depressing. I couldn't look into my parents' eyes and couldn't really say my goodbyes properly. And I remember very clearly that I couldn't stop crying in the departure hall. I was alone and all puffed up and can't stop crying. That was one. Then there's another one, when I was about to leave home for university. We departed from Tg Malim and was apparently late for my flight. So dad sped up and was driving like a mad man! Speedometer shows 150 to 200 km/h. And mom couldn't stop babbling about how fast he was. But that's just mom. I know she's worried. And when we reached the airport my dad scolded my mom for all the noise but all the same was very thankful that we managed to arrive on time. That was again, another time when I had to say goodbye to a fighting pair of parents.

My little sister (G) and little brother (Aiman)

Lastly, knowing that you're about to leave something that you truly love is one of the hardest thing about saying goodbyes. I just had my semester break in Brunei for about a month and I dare say that this holiday was the best so far. Dad's finally got control of his moodswings and everybody was so grown up and very adorable already. I kind of liked being there and didn't feel like going back to uni at all. So, the morning of my flight day, I got up super early to look at my brothers and sisters for the last time before they went to school. I woke up to a grumpy Adib, my youngest brother. When mom asked him to say goodbye to me, he just shook my hand and waited outside. He wouldn't even look at me. I was a bit sad but then I just let him be. But mom told me that Adib didn't like goodbyes and are always acting like that every time someone is leaving. Later that night, when I was already in KK, mom texted me. She told me that she had dinner with Adib and they had a conversation. Here goes,

Mama: Adib, do you miss Wawa?

Adib: Yeah, I feel strange because this t-shirt smells like her *sniffs his Batman shirt* and it smells good. (Maybe because I did the laundry and I did washed that shirt)

Adib, my perfect little git!

So yeah. I haven't really cried over the last goodbye, but as I'm writing this, I'm crying. I couldn't stand it any longer. How I miss that little git and how I missed his cheeky attitude. And how I missed all of them so much right now!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why I hated goodbye so much!

And are about to say yet another goodbye in a few days. A very good friend is moving out of UMS. Sad.

Me and my dad before my flight back to KK.

My mom and I before my flight back to KK.

~najwa

p/s: Can I just be a full time house maid in my parents' house?! I wanna go home! I wanna be with them always! ;(((

berhenti

kau.

apa yang ada kat badan kau semua aku ada.
semua lubang yang ada kat badan kau semua sama dengan aku
bahagian mana yang kau tak faham?

tolonglah berhenti mengendeng kat badan aku.
tolonglah berhenti mengomel tentang segala apa yang aku lakukan.
tolonglah berhenti meraba-raba aku.
tolonglah berhenti lekatkan badan kau kat badan aku.
tolonglah berhenti.

aku bukan seorang yang ria macam kau.
harap maklum.

~najwa

p/s: Do I look like I'm gay?!

Sweet dreams :)

I had a very hard time sleeping last night. I couldn’t sleep. I lay on my bed tossing and turning and ended up watching the fan spinning. So, I started thinking. About people.

Have you ever heard that if you think of someone before you dozed off, they might just ended up in your dreams? Well, here goes.

The first person that came into my mind was Shrek the ‘Imaginary Friend’. I think about him for a brief second. Just wondering how’s he doing and whether or not he… misses me (I know it is an inappropriate question for someone who’s in a relationship like this). But that’s just it. I stopped there.

Then I started thinking about my future. I know I’ve said a few times that I would really love settling down in Brunei and marry some nice & romantic guy from here. But then again I came to my senses, that I was currently waiting for Mr. AT and Mr. AT the same. So he came to my mind. I first know him when I was in form 4. I remember when he used to tell me that he is never really good with girls and that I was his first girlfriend. I broke his heart when I decided to break up with him. But he never really gave up. He was always there, until my matriculation years. It was the hardest year for me. Somehow, I feel like we have this special connection between us. Because whenever I’m in trouble, he always suddenly appears out of nowhere asking about what was going on. It’s like he knew what I was going through. So after my break up with the ‘EX’, I started friends again with Mr. AT. We got really close and he confessed to me of his love once again. I was shocked because all this while I only thought of him like an older brother that I never have. But when I think through about things, there’s nothing that I wouldn’t like about him. He doesn’t smoke, he is not that friendly with girls and he is tall, with curly hair and quite buff too. I mean, come on! What more could I ever wanted from a man? And he’s been really nice to me. Not to mention very patient towards my every behavior too! So, I finally said ‘yes’ to him. And I went to bed with my every thought of him in my mind.

When the sun shines through my eyes, I realized that I was with a friend in a very large, loud crowd. It’s like we were in a concert or something. Suddenly a group of six guys appeared out of nowhere. They seemed like they were in a rush and almost knock us off when they walked past us. But they actually just stood behind us. It was crowded and very dense with people all over the place. Suddenly I felt like my right thigh was in contact with something. I turned around to see a man standing very close beside me. He was slightly taller than me, with a very fair skin, and small eyes.  He looks like he’s part Chinese and is just very cute. And bubbly too! We started talking when I noticed that some of the girls around me started glancing and whispering. Then I heard this one girl said, ’That guy is a blogger right?’ The girl behind her looked at him and just slowly nods.

‘He is funny and naughty but very flirtatious.’ She said.

Can I see you in my dreams every night? :)

I heard them and I was surprised but I decided to ignore the girls. So I just talked and laughed all the way through the show with little Mr. I-don’t-know-who. When the show ended, my friend brought me to a restaurant for dinner. From outside the restaurant I saw someone sitting inside the restaurant. He was staring at me, shock was all over his face and I bet I wore the same look on my face too. I knew exactly who he is the moment I saw him. It’s Mr. AT. He was wearing a white shirt that really shows off his physique. My friend chatted with one of the six guys that we saw earlier and they agreed to let us dine with them. It turns out that Mr. AT was one of the six guys so I had to dine with him. I was very nervous as it was my second time meeting him. There were only five of us there; me, my friend, MR. AT, Mr. I-don’t-know-who and his friend. The other three guys showed up much later. To my greatest surprise, the other three guys were Anwar Hadi, Mat Luthfi and another Mr. I-don’t-know-who. I’m guessing that all six of the guys are actually famous bloggers or vloggers. The other three guys sat at another table because ours

are just too crowded already.

All the time during dinner, I just ate silently. My friend seemed to have a really nice chat with Mr. I-don’t-know-who. I noticed that Mr. AT was always looking at me. He also said, ‘Why say you’re big when you are actually so small?’ I know exactly what he’s talking about. By the looks of it, he doesn’t really think that I was as fat like I always told him. I just smiled at him. When he finishes his food, he joined the other table to smoke. That surprises me because as far as I remember, he told me that he doesn’t smoke. Only sometimes when he was with his friends and I thought maybe this is what he meant. After dinner, all 8 of us went for a walk around the building. But I just walked and talked with him. It was very sweet. It’s as if I was on a date with him. My friend was successfully socializing with Mr. I-don’t-know-who. Mr. AT also walked me home. When we’re almost home, I was woken up to a very painful stomachache. That was when I realized that it was all a dream and I didn’t want to wake up. I want to live it through. But I ended up in the toilet anyway. Major stomachache! Almost felt like food poisoning. Guess I ate too much Cheezy Cheese Carbonara yesterday.

I started pondering again and found out that last night I went to bed thinking of Mr. AT. I might have just missed him then. Maybe that is why I dreamt of him. It was the sweetest dream I’ve had so far. And so real too. I can’t wait to be back in KL this June to meet him J

(I also have this wild thought that maybe that Mr. I-don’t-know-who is actually how Shrek looked like because yesterday I did thought of him too before I went to bed)

~najwa

p/s: Now I know why I find it really hard to draft in MS Word before actually posting in Blogger. That’s because of the goddamned green and red (and sometimes blue) underlines! Very distracting.

pp/s: Sorry for the long post. J

There are reasons for my every behavior

Setiap kelakuan tu bersebab. Semua orang macam tu. Aku pun macam tu. Setiap kelakuan aku yang dianggap pelik oleh segelintir manusia, semuanya bersebab.

Contohnya, orang tak pernah faham bila aku kata aku boleh keluar sorang-sorang. Bukannya aku berlagak, tapi memang aku rasa aku boleh independent.

Aku rasa lebih selesa kalau keluar sorang-sorang. Sebab kalau keluar sorang-sorang ni aku tak payah pikir nak menyusahkan orang lain yang kena teman aku sepanjang masa. Yela, kalau nak ikut semata-mata nak teman aku ke hulu ke hilir cari barang, mesti bosan kan. So, aku malas la nak membosankan orang sebab diri aku sendiri.

Lagi, kalau keluar sorang-sorang ni kita boleh bebas nak pergi ke mana sahaja, bila-bila masa yang kita suka. Tak payah nak kalut fikir pasal orang lain nak pergi mana, kita nak pergi mana.

Dan lagi, kalau keluar sorang-sorang ni senang nak plan journey kita. Macam aku, kadang-kadang aku lebih selesa naik public transport (sebab tu je yang aku mampu bila travel berseorang. Murah, lebih selamat sebab aku belum berapa cekap lagi bawak kereta). So I've got everything well planned. Suddenly macam ramai yang nak ikut. Aku tak kesah la. Suddenly decide nak sewa kereta. Aku tak kisah lagi. Esok tu, SUDDENLY kereta sewa tu tak ada. Haa~ Hamekkau! Ni yang aku tak suka ni. Hancur segala plan aku. Dah la ada banyak benda nak uruskan. Ada kelas pulak nanti. Nak kena kejar masa. Nak naik public dah tak sempat sebab da lewat. Time wasted just like that. Yeah, thank you very much. Hmm~

Ye, aku tau. Keselamatan itu penting. Sebab tu aku ajak sorang untuk teman. Keluar berdua je dah cukup memadai untuk aku. Tak perlu la ramai-ramai. Lagipun, pikir logik la. Kalau adik-adik sekolah menengah kat sini boleh naik public sengsorang dia, kenapa aku tak boleh? Aku hargai kawan-kawan yang amek berat pasal aku and pasal semua ni. Korang risau. Aku tahu. Terima kasih. Tapi aku yang akan jadi tak selesa nanti.

So tolong la faham. There are reasons for my every behavior.

~najwa

p/s: Siyes bukan post ni untuk berlagak independent. Hanya mahu mereka mengerti.

Tentang belajar: Aku; dulu dan sekarang.

Aku tertanya-tanya. Kenapa dulu masa belajar aku senang je nak hafal semua benda. Senang je nak faham semua. Sekarang ni, jangan nak kata hafal or faham, nak membaca pun aku tergagap. Teruk.

So, aku reflect balik aku dulu dan sekarang.

Dulu aku senyap. Sekarang aku bising gila. Mungkin sebab tu aku susah nak terima ilmu. Banyak sangat perkara lagha dalam otak aku ni.

Dulu masa kat sekolah ugama aku rajin hafal ayat-ayat al-Quran dan doa-doa. Mungkin sebab tu la aku senang nak hafal ilmu sampingan yang lain. Sekarang, jangan nak kata hafal semua tu. Nak baca al-Quran pun susah. Teruk! Facepalm sikit!

Dulu aku tak banyak kawan. So fikiran aku selalunya hanya akan fokus kepada pelajaran. Tu yang cemerlang tu. Sekarang aku banyak kawan. Aku happy, tapi pelajaran aku tunggang langgang. Aku stress. Demm~

Dulu aku ada family yang sentiasa pantau aku. Walau macam mana shitty pun keadaan sekeliling, mereka tetap ada. Entah macam mana menjadi pendorong aku untuk berjaya. Papa peneman aku untuk stay up study. Sekarang aku jauh daripada family. Contact pun jarang sekali. Semangat diorang terasa lebih jauh. Dan bila jauh, aku susah nak stay up untuk study. Aku penakut. Chicken!

Mungkin juga hati ini terlalu gelap dan hitam dengan dosa-dosa lampau yang menyebabkan aku susah untuk terima ilmu ini. Pasti. Perlu segera taubat dan minta ampun. Aku tahu. Kuatkanlah hati ini Ya Allah!

Hanya 4 perbezaan dulu dan sekarang yang dapat aku keutarakan. Namun hakikatnya perbezaan itu jauh lebih besar. Kalau dulu cikgu semua muak asyik tengok muka aku naik atas pentas untuk terima anugerah pelajar terbaik, sekarang aku hanya student biasa. Nak duduk sama-sama meraikan mereka yang cemerlang tu pun aku rasa aku tak layak. Aku dah jauh tersasar. Aku tak konsisten.

Sumpah aku rindu zaman kegemilangan itu. Sumpah aku rindu untuk buat mama & papa bahagia dengan kejayaan aku. Aku tak nak dengar mereka redha dengan keputusan aku yang tak seberapa ini. Aku malu.

Aku ingin bangkit. Ingin berjaya seperti dahulu. Ingin merasai manisnya kejayaan itu sekali lagi. Aku akan tebus segala kegagalan aku yang dulu. Untuk aku, untuk masa depan dan untuk mama papa. Insyaallah. Doakan kejayaan aku.


~najwa

p/s: Rasanya mulai sekarang aku harus cuba untuk berubah seperti dahulu. Perlu mula menghafal ayat al-Quran dan doa-doa semula. Perlu lebih dekatkan diri kepada sang Khaliq.

Marah, Amarah, Panas.

I need some anger management sessions. I have anger management issues. Aku cepat melenting. Aku cepat marah. Aku cepat panas. Or whatever shit you call them.

Tapi jenis aku bila marah aku akan senyap. Aku akan pendam. Aku tak akan lepaskan kat orang lain. Aku akan rasa sakit hati tu sorang-sorang. Muka akan automatically berubah. Tiba-tiba akan senyap dan tak hiraukan orang lain.

Tapi, macam mana cepat aku marah, macam tu jugak la cepat aku akan cool down balik. Aku tak suka marah lama-lama. Kadang-kadang aku rasa bila aku pendam marah tu dalam hati, ianya hanya akan memakan hati aku dan menjadikan aku seorang yang lebih monster di masa akan datang. Seorang yang bukan anger-resistant. Crap! Aku diam tapi dalam hati segala jenis caci maki hamun keluar. Ada orang datang mintak biskut daripada aku pun aku rasa macam nak maki je. Kesian dia. Aku nampak sangat bodoh bila berkelakuan begitu. Nampak tak matang. Nampak tak sesuai dengan umur. Kadang-kadang aku tertanya-tanya, apa sebab aku selalu ada masalah mengawal perasaan amarah ni. Adakah disebabkan aku dibesarkan dalam keluarga yang selalu marah-marah, tengking-tengking? Or is it because I take all the arguments a little too seriously?

Tiap-tiap kali aku marah, aku sedar; Islam tak ajar umatnya untuk berperasaan sebegini rupa. Islam selalu mengajar umatnya untuk sentiasa bersabar.

Baru tadi aku terasa 'panas' yang amat sangat. Setan la yang datang tiup angin panas tu. Tak ada benda lain lagi dah. Allah nak duga aku. Aku perlu cari 'ubat' untuk penyakit ni segera. Aku tak suka marah-marah. Islam tak suka. Allah tak suka. Ni salah satu perangai yang aku perlu ubah. Aku perlu jadi seorang yang lebih penyabar. Semoga hati ini tetap kuat dan tabah untuk berubah. Amiin~




~najwa

p/s: Ada terbaca artikel tentang mengawal kemarahan menurut Islam. So, here goes:

Rasulullah SAW bersabda: “Dari ‘Atiah r.a, dia berkata, Rasulullah SAW bersabda: Sesungguhnya marah itu daripada syaitan dan syaitan itu diciptakan daripada api dan sesungguhnya api itu terpadam dengan air, maka apabila salah seorang dari kamu marah, maka hendaklah ia berwuduk (riwayat Abu Daud).”

Apa masalah kau? Apa masalah aku?

Aku seorang kawan yang mempunyai sifat possessive dan jealous yang tinggi gila. Bila aku dah rapat dengan seseorang tu, aku akan cepat jealous tengok dia rapat dengan orang lain pulak. Aku selfish. Ya. But that's just who I really am.

Sepanjang aku belajar ni, aku selalu perasan ada sorang minah ni selalu nak fight dengan aku. Dia macam jealous bila tengok aku dapat attention lebih daripada orang lain. Dia macam tak puas hati tengok aku rapat dengan orang lain. Kadang-kadang tu aku tertanya-tanya jugak. Ke aku yang tak puas hati sebenarnya? Masalah aku ke masalah dia?

So aku diamkan je. Kadang-kadang tu aku terasa hati jugak. Ye la, bila dia try cari attention orang lain, dengan member-member aku semua dia nak sapu. Tapi aku diamkan lagi. Walaupun sebenarnya hati ni pedih. Pedih gila. Macam kena siat-siat je rasanya (not that I really actually know how it feels like having your heart torn apart).

Bila kau nak berhenti sakitkan hati aku? Kau kan uber friendly. Tak cukup ke kawan-kawan keliling kau semua tu? Kenapa still nak jadi magnet dan sedut kawa-kawan aku jugak? Apa masalah kau?

If there's one thing that sucks around here, that 'thing' is you.


~najwa

p/s: Mira, I really need you..! :(

The Social Realist

And so I took a personality test. The results says that I'm a Social Realist. What does it mean actually? Here, read this:

Social Realists like you are popular persons full of energy. You are reliable, well organized and helpful. Traditional values are important to you. Founding a family also plays a central role in your life. Social Realists have a marked social streak. You are always ready to listen to the worries and problems of others and spare no effort when you are asked for help (every personality tests that I took says I'm like this. A good listener they say). With empathy and understanding, you can sense what other people need. You are always willing to highly regard the strong points of the other person and to excuse that person’s weaknesses. You are the most sociable of all personality types. Social contacts are very important to you.

Social Realists find it very difficult to cope with conflicts and criticism - harmony is your elixir of life. Acknowledgement and esteem are very important to you. Differentiation on the other hand is not necessarily one of your strong points. At work and in partnerships, you are loyal, committed and always there when needed. You find it easy to make friends due to your open, warm manner and you have a large circle of friends. Social Realists are more conservative types. You have a set system of values and rules. You prefer clear, structured surroundings and work processes; you find too much change and unrest unpleasant (so true). Your strong points are carefulness and reliability and not so much flexibility and spontaneity. Social Realists are open-minded towards anything new only to a limited extent. But, should one be looking for someone to fulfill a task reliably and exactly, you are the right person.

The Social Realist is the most social among all personality types. For you, it is essential to choose a profession where you can deal with as many people as possible. You recharge your batteries with the help of people contact and the personal exchanges needed for your very special talents to unfold. You are the prototype of the caring person in the positive sense, because you love to act on behalf of others and care for them. If you have the impression that there is a way to contribute by improving the quality of their life, it satisfies you more than anything.

For your type, the feeling to be needed, loved, and appreciated is more than vitally necessary. Therefore, working in seclusion is not for you. It is just too much counter to your extroverted nature, and your need for interpersonal interaction.You have the best ideas during dialogues with others, as they stimulate your creativity. Instead of developing abstract aid projects with the help of a drawing board, you prefer to engage yourself on the frontlines with person to person contact. For you, it is important to see the results of your work so you can go home feeling that you (again) made the world a better place - at least a bit.

You are a born team player. You are open and communicative, easily integrating yourself into group hierarchies. For your personality type, harmony is the keyword in your personal, as well as in your professional life. Since conflicts and power struggles seriously stress you making it difficult for you to attend to your tasks, you should put your emphasis on working in a stress free, respectful, and affectionate environment. Working environments continuously affected by tough infighting, and where competitive conflicts are intense represent too great a strain.








So, yeah. I'm a social realist. :)

~najwa

p/s: Want to know what your personality test says about you? Take it here

Fakta anak kedua :)

Well someone posted this in our SPL page. And I found it mostly about the same as me. Have fun reading (especially if you're the second child in the family :D).

ANAK MANJA EMAK ♥
sebab apa-apa pun mesti dia akan diutamakan oleh ibu. ^^

ANAK DEGIL
Anak kedua dikatakan lebih
degil, keras kepala dan tidak mendengar kata. semua dia aje yg betul.dlm ramai-ramai adik beradik dia aje yg KETEGAQ.kemahuan dia
kuat.kalau buat sesuatu sungguh-sungguh.kalau tak nak tu, tak nak lah
jawabnya, boleh dipujuk tapi
selalunya tak berapa jalan.

TAK PANDAI PUJUK
memang anak no 2 ni dia tak
pandai pujuk makwe or pakwe dia. (ciannn)

BERCINTA
dia kalau bercinta, sangat setia.sanggup berkorban. :D

HITAM / PUTIH
Apa yg dikatakan semua dipegang.kalau
hitam, hitam lah kalau putih, putih lah.degil tak boleh toleransi.

HATI
Anak no 2 ni juga nampak aje
keras.tp hati dia lembut.SATU lagi pe'el dia.dia tak boleh ditegur.

BERDIKARI
Very independent.memang betul.tp kalau terlebih
independent pun payah.mudah bergaul.very take care.

ARAHAN
Anak no 2 ni juga dia payah nk terima arahan.dia lebih suka buat hal sendiri pendek kata tak boleh kerja ngan orang.

PEMAAF & CARING
tidak dinafikan anak no 2 ni pun
pemaaf dan caring.TAPI awas jangan bagi diorang marah kalau diorang marah faham saje lah.

PAKAIAN
Nak semua up to date.semua nak kemas.

*terkena batang hidung sendiri*

~najwa

p/s: copy paste sejaaa.. :)